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When Han Song first met Sophie in a pub, he thought she was gorgeous ... "I thought oh well, I'm Asian, probably she's not interested." He was wrong. Han had only dated Korean women in the past and thought dating a white woman was "a fantasy".

Sophie found Asian men attractive but says it was shared values that was most important.

They see my delight in swiping, an activity most of them find boring or even disheartening at this point, as refreshing.

John specifically sought out an Asian woman for a partner because "Asian women treat western men better than a white woman might".

Edelisa thought a western man would be "better than a Filipino husband" because they're more responsible and provide better for their children.

My hope is that my friends let me play romantic roulette with their love lives because they think my job affords me some top-secret dating intel.

In reality, they probably just let me do it because of how much it fascinates me.

Of course, women of all races have to deal with BS online. But women of color lack that extra race-based privilege, which can cause some mind-bogglingly stupid reactions from people in the online dating world."As a plus-size black woman attempting to find a suitable mate or at least a date, the results can be pretty sad," Christian S., 30, a Dallas, Texas-based fitness blogger and the creator of The Plush Cyclist, tells SELF.

She's tried out Tinder, Plenty of Fish, Ok Cupid, and As such, it’s different from a look at, say, unemployment numbers or test scores. the average.” Think of them as how people weigh race in deciding attraction.So, for example, in the bottom-right corner of the lower table, you see that white women think white men are 17% more attractive than the average guy.Men answered messages from other women—Asian, white, Hispanic, everyone—with average reply rates between 42 and 50 percent. And then there was my own baggage: Up to age 25, my attempts at dating—and I say “attempts” because they weren’t working—had almost exclusively been with white folks (men and women; I’m queer).I found black people attractive, but I didn’t feel I had much in common with them.It was idyllic in some ways—I can’t thank my parents enough for busting their asses through far more intolerant times than my own to make it our home—but being an “other” in a nearly homogeneous community had a profoundly destabilizing effect on my identity.