When you’re a woman who’s into geek guys (or just a little geek-curious) the difficulties grow exponentially. Take it from a dyed-in-the-wool geek who’s seen and done just about every variation of the nerdy meet-cute you can come up with.
Maybe she —but if she’s on a quest, you might just be another annoying NPC.
Plot your course carefully, and follow this flight path: Make a plan of attack.
Fellas are so accustomed to making first move after first move, that it's both refreshing and flattering to be sought.
As long as the woman isn't too aggressive, she is gonna get a date 9 times out of 10.
Including at Ruby Finch's birthday party, on Friday night, where I was too chicken to flirt with some hot uber-politico nerd-dude. And Hot Band Guy writing back to defend # # #After my exceptionally fun evening of speed-dating with the nerds, I decided to get in touch with the man who organized and MC-ed the whole event, on Matt Wasowski, AKA "The Boss of Nerd Nite" (as well as the author of the very nerdy book, MAURA: So, Matt: Nerd-flirting! MATT: There's really only one thing you need to know: Get a nerd drunk and have your way with him. For instance, take the world's sexiest rock-star drummer, like a Tommy Lee. I can certainly be somewhat nerdy about books and movies and indie rock--I guess.
Check out Friday's post for comments from Arlo Pumpernickel, defending Hot Band Guy! The title isn't exclusively reserved for scientists and Trekkies.
There’s a heck of a lot of cultural messaging to the effect that [in a heterosexual relationship] it is a woman’s role to push for commitment and that men dread this conversation, which makes me both extra nervous about it and also kind of resentful.
I would like to be able to leave those feelings at the door when I bring it up, but I’m so lost for the right words to use that I just end up getting even more anxious, and then I don’t bring it up at all because I want to be coming from a place of curiosity and confidence, not from a place of fear. He’s kind and responsible and we laugh together a lot and we are hella attracted to each other.
I made him guess--and finally, he went with "nerd." And again, strangely, I was flattered.
HOW TO MAKE THE FIRST MOVE ON A NERDMAURA: I've had dudes tell me: "Guys love it when women make the first move." But in my own experience, things never seem to work out that well when I take the initiative. MATT: I've never met any male who didn't like being sought out by a lass.
The Convention Comic Con, video game expos, anime conventions… Maybe that good-looking cosplayer just wants to hang out with her friends and be left alone.