That all eventually stopped working and I was just left hating myself for my bad decisions and inability to address my drinking problem and make a change.
I was a fraud and it didn’t take a good guy long to figure that out.I feel really fortunate that I wasn’t in a relationship at the time I hit bottom and took up residency at a 28-day treatment facility for alcohol addiction.I know some of the sins he struggles with, and I want to help him overcome them.This seems to be the right mindset to have as far as preparing to love someone in marriage.We have been together for 11 years and i've only known her as sober.
I have had the same drinking habits all this time, i rarely get drunk (maybe once or twice a year), but regularly have a beer or two.I would constantly wonder how I got myself in situations that compromised my self-worth.Oddly enough, I could usually laugh it off and blame the booze or call a friend with looser morals than myself and use them as my moral compass to feel okay with my behavior.I was holding a plastic tray full of miniature bottles of alcohol—including SKYY Vodka, Beefeater Gin and Johnnie Walker—as part of my Halloween costume. My bowl of peanuts was still full, but all the bottles were nearly empty.I watched as my then-boyfriend chugged the last one.We were on Sunset Boulevard amidst a crowd of jovial Alice in Wonderlands and men dressed as The Golden Girls. She “stopped by” a lot, particularly when I was not around. He flipped my plastic tray and sent the bottles flying. The next morning, I said good-bye to him for good and made a vow to myself: no more alcoholics, and certainly no more enabling such guys by carrying around a tray of their vice. A few months earlier, when we had started dating, I ignored the hints that he was an alcoholic.